Always Have Always Will
by greengrl
Summary: A one-shot Lily and James story of how they first stopped to realise their feelings for each other and the journey through trials and tribulations to falling in love.


_One shot: Lily and James in their final year. _

__**Always Have Always Will**

"You might as well attempt to fly without a broom mate. That's about as likely as you are to get a date with Evans." Sirius Black teased his best friend James as they sat outside the majestic castle. The nice weather has permitted an outside excursion for the friends instead of their scheduled History of Magic class.

"You say this Black but in fact you have no idea of this situation. I am not the same immature youth of past years in which I partook in the age old method of playground flirting, in which I pissed off the girl in order to get her attention. I'm not a kid anymore. This is our final year. I don't want to mess around anymore." James said leaning against the tall old tree in the castle grounds, he ruffled his shoulder length chestnut hair and let go of the golden snitch in his palm, which unfurled its wings and buzzed around. It went to zip away and his speedy reflexes snatched it out of the air again.

"I'm hurt Prongs! Are you saying that you ae leaving the marauder way behind and leaving us for... A female?" Sirius exclaimed dramatically. His hand swept over his forehead as if he was a swooning maiden.

"I would never leave you boys you know that. I'll always be a Marauder. But I have to try." James said quietly looking off into the distance.

The explosion in the hall made the tables shake and the food fly up in the air. The whole room filled with a mixture of shrieks and laughing as the dishes flew in different directions. Mostly hitting Slytherins but one particular scream did not come from a Slytherin.

"Potter!" A high-pitched screech rang out. A slender red head was sat at the end of the Gryffindor table and her usually perfectly quaffed mane of red hair was dripping with whipped cream, as it appeared she had had the brunt of the exploding trifle.

James Potter and the rest of his friends sat quietly at the table, laughing to themselves as their prank took place. When the screech rung out the colour drained from James' face as he looked down the table at Lily Evans in all her fury. She rose up from her seat and stomped down the table.

"You are the most immature pathetic little person on the planet Potter. When are you going to grow up and stop playing these ridiculous pranks to get attention!" She screamed at him as she stormed past him towards to entrance hall. James stood up and looked at his friends who all looked on in amusement as James' predicament.

"Lily!" James called out after the girl who was running up the steps towards the common room. She didn't even turn around though at the call though.

"Lily please I'm sorry!" He called again. "It was only meant to be a little joke!" He added trying to be light hearted. At this she turned around, having reached the top of the stairs, he was about half way down having chased her.

"That's it with you isn't it. Everything is a joke. One of these days someone is going to turn the tables and you'll be the joke and you won't get any laughs out of that Potter. Try growing up before then." She said, no longer screaming but her face still equally furious. His face serious he watched as she turned around and carried on running towards the common room.

* * *

Lily walked down the corridors late in the evening after having finishing her homework, she was thinking deeply about her next assignment, which she wanted to get finished before Christmas break. Just as she was passing the third floor corridor she heard a noise of a girl talking. It was passed curfew but as Lily was a prefect she got to stay out later. But she knew that giggle wasn't the sound of another prefect patrolling.

She went to inspect the noise, creeping down the corridor books in hand. She rounded a corner and saw a girl leaning into a tall boy with dark hair. They were kissing and the girl's hands were meshed into the boy's hair and she passionately kissed the boys. The boy in question being James Potter.

Lily gasped in surprise at her discovery and dropped a book heavily on the floor. It startled her and the couple and the girl pulled away from the boy to turn around and see what the commotion was. A smirk appeared on the girls face, she was a sixth year Ravenclaw and looked at Lily like the cat that had got the cream. James' extremely red face did not have the same expression though. He looked at though he was horrified to have been caught.

"Lily…" He said finally after the awkward moment had been drawn out. Lily didn't even pause to think before she bent and grabbed her book though and ran off in the opposite direction. She didn't stop till she reached a different floor and she stopped to catch her breathe and lean against a wall. She sank to the floor and gasped for air as she wondered quietly why she felt that seeing James kiss someone was like someone kicking her in the stomach.

* * *

James strolled through Hogsmeade with the boys, Sirius was larking around sending spells in the direction of some Slytherins whose hair turned bright pink. Peter laughed hysterically and Remus chuckled disapprovingly.

James was quiet however having been in an extremely long sulking period after the scene with Lily where he was caught kissing a Ravenclaw girl called Ramella Pritchett. She had lured him down to the third floor on the pretence that she had discovered some 3rd years sneaking out. As they were both prefects he had believed her but on arrival it was clear she just wanted the excuse to be alone with him and had pounced on him just as Lily had discovered them. Afterwards he had told her off and said it was never going to happen. But the damage was done and now Lily wouldn't look at him, never mind yell at him, which seemed strange as why would she care if he were kissing someone else?

They strolled through the town popping in and out of shops, the majority of their time was spent in Zonko's spending their allowances on tricks and pranks for school. The boys were heading to the pub for some butter beers when the gate on a house down the street blew open and the gate flew across the street along with black flames. Four hooded figures walked through the space where the gate had been and soon people began screaming. The street was full of students who at the sound of the explosion had started running in all different directions.

The hooded figures wore metallic masks of terrifying faces and James realised these were the rumoured Death Eaters who were the soldiers of a dark wizard who was terrorising the wizarding world. The street was mayhem with spells flying everywhere as more hooded figures appeared and started attacking.

Sirius and James jumped into action trying to get the younger kids away, as well as shooting the death eaters with spells. James pushed through the stampeding crowd. He pushed through and found himself near the front of the fight.

Aurors were apparating in and joining the fight, and majority of the students had dispersed in all directions. James continued to push through, adrenaline taking over. He froze however when he saw a figure lying on the floor, the face not visible but the streak of red hair was undeniable. He broke into a run and pushed his way towards her body lying on the floor.

He dropped to his knees and pushed her hair off her face, she was breathing but there was a nasty gash on her head. He pulled her body to his and scooped her up with one arm under her legs and the other under her body. Her body lay limply in his arms and he knew he had to get her out of here.

He looked around and couldn't see a way out. There was fighting everywhere, he saw a space and went for it and ran down the street in the direction of the pub. He got near when a spell flew past his shoulder. He looked over his shoulder and saw a death eater coming down the street towards him. He ran as fast as his legs could take him and burst through the pub doors. Inside was a bubble of people hiding and caring for injured people.

He lay Lily down on a table and called out for help. A woman ran forward, he recognised her as the owner of the pub but there was no time for chat and he took one more look at Lily, reached out and touched her hair gently. She stirred but didn't wake up and he knew he couldn't wait around. He turned and ran back out the door just at the death eater was rounding on the building.

James knew he had to keep the death eater away from the building; it was full of the injured and young children from school. James shot a spell at him, the first he could think of was a body-binding curse. The one he received back was much more strong and James barely reflected it. He shot another stunning spell in the death eaters direction and ran in the opposite direction of the pub to draw him away.

He ran and ran until he was tired and he turned to face his attacked, they threw spells back and forth at each other, James barely managing to hold his own. He was about to deflect another spell when he heard his name called and he looked to his left, Sirius was sprinting towards him with two aurors behind him. He faltered and suddenly a piercing pain shot through his heart and he felt the world slowly black out around him.

* * *

The light immediately began to hurt his eyes as James came round. He was lying down and could feel the soft sheets of a bed beneath him. He slowly opened his eyes and began to focus on where he was.

He could see a lot of white and he realised he was in the infirmary which was a familiar sight for him over the years. He tried to sit up and groaned loudly from the pain that shot through his whole body. He heard a gasp from his left and he shifted slightly so he could turn and look. A small figure was curled up in a chair next to his bed with a book in their lap.

"James," Lily whispered. He felt surprise wash over him as he looked at Lily sitting at his bedside. He also felt relief that she was okay after the battle.

"You're here," He managed to croak out. She was wearing her own clothes and her hair was bundled up in a bun on her head, her face, in his opinion, still looked beautiful, but the dark circles around her eyes gave away how worn out she was.

"I… I wanted to make sure you were okay." She said quietly, a small blush rising on her cheeks.

"Are you okay?" James asked seriously, he managed to pull himself slightly up so he wasn't so horizontal and he could look at her better.

"I'm fine, I got a bit trampled in the stampede after the attack but nothing the nurse couldn't fix. You… you saved me." She said. It was his turn to blush a little. He coughed and tried to think of something to say. He was still baffled as to why she was sat next to his bed.

"How long was I unconscious?" James asked changing the subject.

"Three days." Lily said, "The boys have visited every day, but they said they had to go visit Remus' sick mother tonight so they will visit tomorrow." James nodded, knowing that in fact tonight was a full moon and the boys were accompanying him to the shrieking shack. "Your parents have visited too, but they have been trying to clear up everything from the battle, I didn't know they were aurors James. You're very like your father."

"Did you visit me every day?" James asked suddenly, changing the topic again. Lily continued to get redder.

"I just needed to make sure you were okay. I wanted to say thank you." Lily said. "I thought you might get a visit from Romella, your… friend from Ravenclaw but she hasn't been by." Lily added, something was in her voice but James couldn't quite tell what it was.

"She is not my friend." James said, Lily looked into his eyes and smiled slightly. "She just… tricked me that night. I have no interest in her what so ever which is what I told her and I am guessing that is the reason she hasn't visited."

"Okay," Lily said. "I'm glad you're okay."

"Thank you, for visiting me… and well I'm glad you're here. I hope that we can be friends now. I hate fighting with you." James said quietly. Lily nodded in agreement.

"Right," Lily said. She closed her book and looked uncomfortable. "I should go. Classes are cancelled till the new year now but I'm heading home tomorrow for Christmas break. I should go… and pack."

"Yeah, of course. I'll see you though… thanks Lily." James said trying to sit up further and wincing in pain.

"Don't get up, I'll see you James." Lily said leaving, leaving a stunned James as he just realised that for the first time she had called him James.

* * *

Lily sighed as she did the dishes in her family home. Yet again another argument had broken out between her and her sister. This time about the fact Lily was a witch and Petunia was having her fiancée come over and she didn't want Vernon to know about Lily's "freakishness". Lily washed the dishes the muggle way, she sometimes found it relaxing to do things the old fashioned way, and considering the argument she had just had she didn't want to push her luck.

She had been home for just under three weeks and had heard nothing from James and she didn't know why this bothered her so much. She hadn't contacted him and she didn't know why she expected him to contact her.

She had one more day of holiday left and then she would be heading to London to go back to school. She awaited the next day with apprehension that she couldn't quite decipher the cause of. She finished wiping the dishes and headed up to her room where she would hide until after Vernon's visit.

She sat in her room and read quietly to catch up on her studies. She was startled though when a sharp tapping sounded at the window and she saw the familiar owl that delivered her Daily Prophet. She ran to the window and opened it so the bird flew in. She hastily put the money in the owl's leg pouch and fed it a couple owl treats she had in her room. She then reopened her window and let the bird sweep back outside into the cold air.

She sat back on her bed and unfolded the paper. She took a glance on the front page and recognised the person smiling from the picture. It was a picture of James, and his parents whom Lily had met during James' recovery. She looked to the headline with confusion and gasped.

"Senior Ministry Officials Henry and Serena Potter murdered by Dark Lord!"

She felt frozen. She read and re-read the article to ensure she had it right. James' parents had been murdered. She suddenly felt tears run down her face, they were tears of grief for James' loss. She read the article and said that the couple had been murdered at home and that their son and heir, had been out visiting a friend and had come back to discover his parents.

Lily's tears hit the pages of the newspaper in floods at the shocking and terrible details of the story. She couldn't believe such cruelty could happen in the world and all she could think about was James.

* * *

Lily pulled her cloak tighter around her as the cold air of the platform hit her. She climbed aboard the train and dragged her trunk behind her whilst waving to her parents who waved on proudly, Petunia next to them scowling and looking around with a look of disgust and mild terror.

The train set off and Lily found a compartment with the girls from her dorm in. She hugged them all and heard a few details of their winter breaks, before announcing she had to go and see someone and she would be back later. They all looked at each other with a knowing look and looked sad as they guessed she would be off to see James.

Lily walked down the train looking in each compartment until she reached the very last compartment, which had the shutters down and was locked. She guessed through the process of elimination that this must be the compartment the marauders inhabit. She tapped gently on the door and a few mumbles from inside occurred before the door opened a crack and Remus Lupin's tired face appeared.

"Hi Lily," He said without smiling but not in an unfriendly way, he looked even more drained than normal.

"Hi, is James there?" Lily asked trying to peak behind him into the compartment but Remus kept the door open barely a crack.

"He's… not seeing anyone right now Lily. Sorry. Bye." Remus said then suddenly shut the door in her face and she was left outside and confused.

* * *

Lily wandered through the next week of school a bit like a ghost, she didn't see James in any of his classes but she did see Sirius Black. Who looked as bad as she imagined James looked. Beatrice, one of Lily's dorm friends Alyssia who had dated Sirius at one point, told her that Sirius was estranged from his family and the Potter's had basically raised him since he was 13, so he clearly was as devastated as James.

Sirius didn't go to every class but the ones he did make he sat hunched over, not talking, not playing his usual jokes. He just kept to himself and as soon as the bell rang he stalked out of the classroom without speaking to anyone. Lily had thought about asking him about James but thought better of it after at lunch one day someone on the Slytherin table called out to Sirius about being a blood traitor. Sirius had grabbed the boy by the scruff of his neck and thrown him about ten feet over the table. He got a month's detention for that but he didn't seem to care, he didn't seem to care about anything.

* * *

After two weeks Lily began to worry that James may never return to class, she knew he was still in school because she had glimpsed him once late at night walking in the grounds. But since then she hadn't seen him and began to think he was a ghost.

One day when Lily had a free afternoon, she decided to go outside instead of sitting cooped up in the library. The weather was freezing but the castle had been laid with a thick layering of snow and she put on thick layers and headed out.

She watched as first years run around having snow fights and shouting and laughing. The further she got away though the quieter it got. She kicked her way through the snow, hands in pockets and head down. She enjoyed the cold air; it made her feel refreshed after being inside all day. She reached the point over looking the lake and she sighed at how pretty the view was. Her sigh faltered though when she saw a figure sat right by the water.

She knew straight away who it was, she recognised the messy mop of dark hair. He sat very still on a rock, with his hands in his pockets and his back hunched over. She suddenly felt an over whelming feeling of nerves. But this didn't stop her from taking the steps down to the waterside, she paused just before she reached him, she knew he had heard her approach as he lifted his head slightly but he didn't turn to look. He just kept on looking ahead. She walked around the rock he was sat on and tentatively took a perch next to him.

She saw him visibly jump a little when he realised it was her, he red head was hidden under a hat but its long tresses flowed out over her shoulders. She sat down and said nothing, they both just stared out at the lake.

Eventually Lily cleared her throat and spoke.

"I'm so…" She didn't even get to finish before he raised his hand and stopped her.

"Don't," He croaked out, his voice sounded hoarse as if he hadn't used it for a while. "I can't hear that, not from you." She finally got a good look at his face, gone was the youthful cheerful face; it was replaced with a worn and tired face of someone a lot older.

"You haven't come to class since you've been back." Lily said more of a statement than a question.

"I know. I just don't really want to be around people." James said, Lily flinched at that comment and felt suddenly unwelcome.

"I should go." She said, climbing down from her spot next to him.

"Don't!" James suddenly said, his hand shooting out and grabbing her hand. His hands were freezing and it made the goose bumps on the back of her neck stand up, she blamed it on his cold hands but somehow deep down she knew it was his touch that caused her to flinch. She returned to her spot next to him. Her hands still in his, she put her other hand on top of them in an attempt to warm his hand up.

"You're freezing." She said. He almost smiled but his face dropped and couldn't hold it.

"I'm fine. You should go back inside soon though, you must have class." James said.

"I'm free this afternoon. You have class too. Will you come back soon?" She asked. He shrugged.

"Maybe. I just… don't feel right." He said. "I feel like, empty. Like I can't just go back to being normal." He squeezed her hand a bit tighter and she squeezed back.

She sat with him for a while longer then he told her she should go back inside and she listened. First though she transfigured some nearby leaves into woollen gloves and made him put them on, he again tried to smile but it dropped as soon as she saw a flash of it. But it was enough. She left him in his spot and wandered back up to the castle.

* * *

It wasn't the next day, but James did come back to classes. He sat at the back, and he didn't participate. But he and Sirius sat quietly together, Remus and Peter in front of them, and they were there, which seemed like progress.

James didn't really speak to Lily, but occasionally he would sit on the same table as her in the library. She had never seen him there before but she assumed he had quite a bit to catch up on. He would say hello, then sit in silence and do his work. She would smile, and whilst she worked she would cast her eyes up and look at him, he would always be immersed in his work. He did catch her looking once and she blushed, but he just briefly smiled and would continue with his work.

Within a month he was participating in class again, talking to some of his old friends, everyone let him slowly get back to normal, without pushing him. Lily waited for him to come and speak to her, maybe even annoy her like back in the olden days. But bar the occasionally study buddy he kept his distance.

Easter holidays soon loomed and Lily wrote to her parents to say she would be coming home, school had been intense, with the NEWTs studying and the confusion she felt about James. She needed some time away to get her head straight.

The day before leaving Lily was in the library and James strolled in. He almost looked normal again, the dark circles beneath his eyes had shrunk and his face had a bit more colour in it. He glanced across the library and spotted Lily. He placed his bag on the table she sat at and sat across from her.

As he laid her books out, Lily looked up at him, she felt nervous but decided to bite the bullet and speak to him.

"What are you doing over the holidays?" She asked quietly so not to upset the librarian. He looked up surprised that she had spoken to her. He cleared his throat and spoke.

"I'm going to stay at Sirius' flat, he bought one after coming into some inheritance from a relative that didn't disown him." He said lightly.

"That's good." She replied smiling. She was glad he wasn't staying in the castle alone.

"What about you?" He asked.

"Oh, I'm just going home, not that I'm looking forward to spending time with my sister and her lump of a fiancée." Lily said.

"Sounds like fun," He said before the librarian came over and silenced them, he then picked up his quill and started his notes. She went back to her work and they sat in comfortable silence.

* * *

The next day Lily went down to the train with her friends. She found herself glancing around looking for James, but she didn't see him.

Lily and her friend Xanthia couldn't find a compartment, then they bumped into Alyssia walking down the train.

"Come on, I'm sitting with the others." Alyssia said, they weren't sure whop the others were but they were tired of lugging their trunks up and down so they followed her. Lily suddenly realised they were at the end of the train though and she paused.

"Wait, are you sitting with…" Lily began to ask as Alyssia slid the door to the compartment open. Inside sat the marauders along with a couple other Gryffindor 7th years. Alyssia walked in a sat next to Sirius who wrapped his arm around her and whispered something into her ear, which made her blush and giggle. Lily hadn't even realised they were back together which showed how much she paid attention recently.

Xanthia plopped down on the floor next to Remus Lupin and started talking about something in class the other day. Leaving Lily to sit between the door and Alyssia. Which was directly across from James, who had looked surprised when they walked in but masked it quickly and said hi then kept his head down and read a quidditch book.

The train ride felt like it took forever but the compartment was alive with chatter as the friends talked. Sirius was speaking more like his old self saying how he was going to save up and buy a bike, and James laughed from his book and said he would be a danger to the world.

The train lurched on and by the time it arrived the sun was going in and just as it went to night they arrived in King's Cross. Everybody piled out of the compartment, Lily opened her trunk to put her books away and was struggling to close it as everyone left. She finally got the clasp secured and turned to leave when she realised James still stood at the compartment door, everyone else having piled off the train chattering about finding trolleys and their parents.

Lily smiled up at him, and he smiled slightly back, he looked nervous.

"Lily, I was wondering…" James started looking like he was trying to say something important.

"Yes James," She asked curious as to why he had had to wait till she was alone to ask her this.

"I was wondering if you had plans over the holidays?" He finally asked.

"Um… not really. Just family and studying really. Why?" She asked picking up the handle to her trunk and pulling it forward slightly as if to motion to start walking, but he stood still.

"I just wondered if you would mind if I visited you." James said very quickly. He took a step forward and put his hands up.

"If you don't want me to then don't worry, I just thought it would be nice to see where you live. I've never seen a muggle house before and I bet yours is nice and I could take you for coffee or something and then…" He rambled on and eventually her giggle at his nerves stopped him and he blushed and ruffled his hair in that age old annoying fashion.

Lily went to say yes, but his close proximity had distracted her. So instead she acted on her impulses and leant forward and kissed him gently on the cheek, then whispered in his ear.

"I would really like that James." She said, she was so close now her body almost touched him. She noticed he was barely breathing whilst she was this close. He then acted on his impulses and pulled her into a hug, he buried his face in her hair and smelt the heavenly smell of her strawberry shampoo. She wrapped her arms around him back and felt so safe and secure she almost didn't want to let go. But eventually they did, and they smiled and picked up their trunks. James helping Lily get hers off the train and then waving and saying he would owl her the next day, she nodded then turned and walked off to find her parents with a smile she couldn't get rid of on her face.

* * *

Lily waited in her house all the next day for her owl from James, but it never came, in fact it didn't come the next day or the day after. She was making excuses at first but after the third day she realised he must have changed his mind. So she tried to keep herself busy, studying, helping her Mum with her errands and she decided to take up running again. She would run and run until she couldn't go any further.

It was almost a week when Lily was in bed at about 10pm at night she felt a tap at her window, she got up assuming it was an owl from one of the girl who had been messaging her. She pulled the curtains back and almost fainted when she saw James Potter on a broom hovering outside her room.

"James what the hell are you doing?" Lily exclaimed as she opened her window to him when he smiled sheepishly.

"Please let me in and explain, I have so much to tell you." James said, he was visibly shivering in the cold night air and she sighed in annoyance and opened the window further.

"Come in before you freeze you idiot." She said. He quickly scrambled into the window, knocking a few ornaments off and making a big of a clatter, he landed on the floor ungracefully and lay then for a second catching his breathe. Lily just stood and looked at him with her hands on her hips with an expression of annoyance and disbelief.

Suddenly there was a tap at the door and Lily glanced at the door horrified.

"Lily honey is everything okay in there? It sounds like a elephant is tap dancing from downstairs." Her Mums voice sounded through the door. James looked at Lily and looked as if he was about to crack up laughing so Lily dived on James and put her hand over his mouth before he could make a sound.

"Everything's fine Mum, I was just moving my trunk and dropped it." Lily called out, "I'm just getting changed for bed now so I'll see you in the morning. " Her Mum called good night out and went off to bed.

Lily then found herself alone with James on the floor with her hand over his mouth and in very close proximity. As soon as she realised how close they were she jumped up and walked over to the other side of the room.

"What are you doing here James? Its ten o'clock at night, you could have owled first!" Lily said as soon as she was a safe distance away. Lily finally got a good look at him and saw he had a big bandage on his arm and neck. He stood up slowly, and looked uncomfortable.

"What happened to you James? You don't message me, then you turn up here days later and you're hurt. Tell me now before I freak out!" Lily said getting more and more stressed out. He put his hands up to quiet her.

"Okay, okay I'll tell you, but don't freak out." James said. She took a deep breath and waited for him to continue. "So I went to stay at Sirius' and the first night we got back death eaters burned the place up and we barely made it out alive. It was the same ones who got my parents who coincidentally are probably Sirius' deranged pureblood mania friends. Then the ministry took us and put us in hiding, we've been there for days and I couldn't contact anyone. But I promise you I would have if I could have." He looked desperate at he told her this story and her eyes bulged at the details. He stopped to take a breath and gage her reaction.

"James," She started finally. "I can't believe this. Are you okay? Where's Sirius? Is he okay? Where have you been hiding out? Are you still in danger? What's going to happen now?" She rambled off; she was so shocked by what he told her she was practically having a panic attach. He walked over to her though and grabbed her by the shoulders.

"Lily I'm okay. Sirius is okay. I can't tell you where we're hiding for your own safety but we're fine. A few burns but nothing that won't heal. Its okay, we're going to be okay." James said to comfort her, she let out a little whimper and he pulled her into a hug and she wrapped her arms around her.

"It just reminds me of that day, when you saved me and I thought you… I thought you weren't going to make it. I hate to think of you getting hurt James." She said, James was so surprised to hear Lily admitting that she cared about what happened to him. She let him go eventually and blushed, then let out a yawn.

"You're tired, you should go to bed and I should go, I'll see you back at school, I need to stay out of sight till then. So I better go." James said reaching for his broom.

"Can't you… " Lily started and James turned to look at her. "Can you just stay for a bit longer, until I go to sleep." Lily asked blushing ferociously. James smiled.

"Yeah sure." James said, Lily awkwardly walked over to her bed and got in under the covers. James walked over too but he lay on top of the covers, pushing his shoes off onto the floor. He lay next to her and they lay on their sides looking at each other.

"I'm sorry I didn't message you, I really wanted to." James said quietly.

"I know. I believe you." Lily responded. James smiled in relief.

"I really care about you Lily." James said looking into Lily's eyes. Her eyes widened and he got a great look at her beautiful green eyes. She looked back and she couldn't help herself, she leaned in and gently kissed James on the lips. He moaned then when she tried to deepen the kiss he pulled back. She faltered and then pulled back and looked at him, embarrassed that he had ended it so quickly.

"What's wrong?" She asked abruptly, her feelings hurt. He looked like he was battling with something.

"Lily… I cannot say how much I have dreamed of this moment. But…" Her heart stopped when he said "but". "I just don't' feel like I'm ready for this, with everything that's happened… my… my parents… and this week. I just don't feel like I should be this happy. I'm not ready to be happy yet. I just need time." He blurted out. She suddenly understood and nodded. At the mention of his parents his eyes watered slightly and he tried to hide his face so she didn't see him cry. But she pulled his face back to her and pulled him into a hug.

"Take as long as you need James." She said then she lay her head on his chest and that was how she fell asleep, in his arms.

Lily woke up and felt cold like something was missing. She reached out and her hand felt an empty space except for a piece of paper. She opened her eyes and read what was written.

_Lily,_

_Sorry I didn't stay longer, but I had to get back before anyone noticed I was missing. Sirius can only cover for me so long. I won't be able to contact you again this holiday but I will see you on the train._

_Thanks for last night; it was exactly what I needed. I can't wait to see you again._

_James x_

She sighed and held the note close to her and thought to herself how strange it was that she felt like this over James Potter, but that she also couldn't wait for the next time to see her.

* * *

The first day back at school couldn't come quick enough, Lily constantly thought of and worried about James. When she got to Kings Cross she hurriedly kissed her parents and ran through the barrier.

She looked around for a shock of dark hair. She paced towards the back of the train and she saw a group of ministry workers surrounding someone and then she saw him. He was dragging his trunk and talking to Sirius who seemed to be pretty pissed off with their entourage of bodyguards.

Lily walked over to them and James turned and saw her. His face split into a grin that she hadn't seen on his face in too long. He pushed through the aurors and walked over to her and picked her up and spun her round.

"I missed you." James said into her ear, which made her grin like an idiot.

"I kind of missed you too Potter." She said playfully using his surname like in the old days.

They boarded the train, a couple of aurors stood outside the compartment to keep an eye on things and the marauders and Lily's friends all sat in the usual compartment.

Lily was quiet during the journey and just leant on James' shoulder while she read. He was chatting with the boys, catching up and it felt so normal for them all to be together.

* * *

The next few months went in a blur of exam hell and end of school celebrations. James couldn't believe it had all come to an end so quickly but the last few months had been the hardest of life, but at the same time getting closer to Lily had been one of the best.

They still hadn't moved any further; they acted more like best friends, with an extreme amount of sexual tension thrown in. But James still had this looming feeling of grief that washed over him whenever he felt himself getting too close to Lily. He knew he would have to move on eventually from what happened to his parents but the thought that he was allowed to be happy seemed so alien after everything.

* * *

The year came to a close with the final exam and the cheers at the end were so loud as the 7th years threw their hats in the air and began to celebrate. The next day was their final assembly and as top in the year Lily had been given the honour of giving the 7th year speech. She looked nervous as she walked to the front of the hall to stand behind Dumbledore's lectern, James couldn't help but think how cute she looked.

After clearing her throat and the hall coming to a quiet she began.

"Congratulations 7th years. To use a clichéd line "we made it". These past 7 years have been the most influential and challenging of our lives, and the fact that we have all completed it shows that we are all ready for the next stage in our lives.

Through the trials and tribulations that have gone on through out the years, whether it be something small like a hard history of magic test, or something big like the battles we have faced within the wizarding world. We celebrate our success in reaching this point, and we mourn those who unfortunately cannot be here to celebrate with us.

Let us not dwell on the past though as the exciting part is only just beginning, some of you will be Aurors, ministry officials, work at St Mungoes – the world is out there to experience! But all I can say is this, you've made it this far, make sure when you walk out of the doors of Hogwarts tomorrow, you go out and you experience what the world had to offer. As you should never fear failure, you should fear the chance that you make look back and regret never trying. Congratulations 7th years, go out now and make the change you want to see in the world!"

By this point the class were on their feet clapping and cheering and suddenly James had this over powering feeling to get on with his life. Lily's words had really hit home and before he knew it his feet were taking him out of his chair and suddenly he was walking fast towards the front of the stage. Lily was there, looking beautiful in here robes and she was grinning and clapping.

James couldn't stop himself, he ran onto the stage and stood next to Lily. She didn't notice him till he was right next to her. He looked at her for a second to gather his nerves.

"James what are you…" Lily started then he did it.

In front of the entire staff and students of Hogwarts James Potter grabbed Lily Evans and kissed her fully on the mouth. She gasped but kissed him back with equal fervour. The crowd of students went mad, Sirius was shouting "about bloody time" and Slytherins sat down and did not cheer but even Dumbledore was laughing and clapping.

James felt like he and Lily were the only ones in the room though as his lips touched her impossibly soft lips. Finally he came back to reality and pulled away, and just before he pulled properly away he whispered in her ear.

"I will never be able to look back and regret that moment Lily Evans. As that was easily the best moment of my life." He said grinning goofily at her like he had taken a love potion. She was blushing furiously at the show they had put on but she couldn't help but laugh.

"James Potter, I think I might have to agree with you on that one." She said kissing his cheek. She put her hand in his and went to walk off stage but he pulled her back in once more.

"I love you Lily. Always have, always will."


End file.
